


Post-OotP drabble from LJ

by QueenThayet



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-03
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-06-06 05:01:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6739132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenThayet/pseuds/QueenThayet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A reaction drabble to Order of the Phoenix that I posted on LJ back in 2003. Remus mourning the loss of Sirius. Someone was asking about it, so I'm putting it up on AO3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Post-OotP drabble from LJ

Remus sat on the couch at 12 Grimmauld Place, his head cradled in his hands. Molly hovered around the door way as if she wanted to go in. Arthur spotted her and pulled her away. 

“He just needs to be alone right now, Molly.”

“Oh, Arthur, I feel like I need to do something,” Molly said, wringing her hands.

“How would you feel if I died?” Arthur asked gently.

Molly gasped, “Don’t you say that! Anyway, it’s not the same, we all loved Sirius.”

Arthur looked affronted, “Are you saying everyone doesn’t love me? It is the same, Molly. Just let him alone to grieve.” With that, he gave her a gentle shove away from the drawing room. 

Remus was unaware of the conversation that had just taken place about him. He was unaware of his torn and bloodstained clothing. He was unaware of his rumbling belly, begging for food. He was unaware of his drooping eyelids, begging for sleep. Even if he had noticed; he couldn’t do anything. Remus was unable to move; all he could do was scream inside his head. 

“Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, you’re not dead, you’re not, you’re not!”

It couldn’t be true. Sirius, dead? Sirius survived everything. He survived Voldemort the first time. He survived Wormtail’s attack. He survived, and escaped, Azkaban. Remus felt a small surge of pride, his Sirius could do anything, what other said was impossible. Pride was soon replaced by distress. He wasn’t his Sirius anymore. He was dead. Gone. Forever. 

Remus let out a cry and started to weep. “No, no, no, goddamnit NO!” He couldn’t be gone. After James and Lily died and everyone said that Sirius had been responsible, Remus couldn’t believe it. Sirius had always been there for him. First as a best friend, he became an illegal animagus for him. Then later, as something more. After school, Lily and James went off and got married, Peter just went off, and Remus and Sirius went off, got an apartment together and were deliriously happy. After he was shipped off to Azkaban, Remus never thought he’d be happy again. He kept on with his life, though, always hoping. Then Sirius escaped, and found Remus. Together again, after more than a decade. Even though they were on the run, at least they were together. And now…

Remus looked up, his wailing had attracted the attentions of his friends. 

“What?” he snarled. He just wanted to be alone with his grief. Everyone scurried off in opposite directions. Remus looked around. This was Sirius’ house. Everything in it was his, theirs. Remus took one more look around, fighting off tears, and losing. He left the drawing room, walked into the foyer, and then left quietly. He didn’t bring a coat, though it was pouring down rain. He walked and walked and walked, trying to escape his grief, a poor slumped over figure, walking alone in the rain.


End file.
